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WEDDING CEREMONIES

I officiate secular vow renewals and commitment ceremonies as well as “traditional” wedding ceremonies. I delight in celebrating love wherever it blooms.

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The ceremony design process typically begins with a Zoom meeting during which we’ll discuss what kind of ceremony you are envisioning.  Next, you'll go through “The Book,” my 60+ page volume of wedding ceremony pieces. You and your sweetheart will highlight everything you like–like kids in a candy store–words, sentences, paragraphs, or whole sections. Later, I’ll weave your selections from The Book together into a custom ceremony. My couples love this method. You’ll get a one-of-a-kind ceremony based on your desires and choices…no two are ever alike.

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Your  ceremony will likely include the following elements:

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  • Welcome to Guests/Opening Words

  • Address to the Couple

  • Intentions (a statement of consent)

  • Vows

  • Ring Exchange

  • Closing Words/Pronouncement

 

You might also elect to include:

 

  • Poetry or readings from literature

  • A musical selection

  • Sharing of wine (I’ve also seen sharing of home brewed beer, shots, and frosty margaritas!)

  • Sand  blending ceremony

  • Pledge of community support

  • Family vows/inclusion of your children

 

I’ve been honored to officiate weddings in which I am asked to incorporate various cultural traditions, as well as traditions that reflect and honor religious heritage without the “god” part. Please note that while I am happy to perform ceremonies that originate in your culture (with your invitation to do so) or my own culture, I cannot perform ceremonies from cultures unrelated to you or me for the sake of being “interesting,” “boho,” “multi-culti,” etc. Some ceremonies I’ve been asked to perform include:

 

  • Passing of the peace

  • Breaking the glass

  • Lei ceremony

  • Handfasting

  • Jumping the broom

  • Veil and lasso/arras

  • Tea ceremony

 

Some couples wish to further personalize their wedding by creating their own ritual within the ceremony. For example:

 

  • Planting a tree

  • Inviting guests to speak

  • Hand washing ceremony

 

What will your ceremony not include?

 

  • I can “bless” your union as The Official Representative of The Universe, but sorry, I don’t say “god.” This is Agnostic Weddings, after all!

  • I will not lead you and your guests in prayer.

  • I will customize the length of your ceremony to your wishes; however my ceremonies top out at around 30 minutes. My experience has been that a 15-20 minute ceremony is a sweet spot for most couples and their guests. Sometimes ceremonies are more involved and can last into the 25-30 minute range. Any longer than that and we risk your guests checking the time and wondering “How much longer?” Your ceremony should be memorable for its content, rather than its length.

  • I also won’t slip anything into your ceremony that you didn’t ask for.  That would be awkward.

 

…but that’s about it.  I’ve been asked to tell jokes, recite from The Princess Bride, arrive in costume.  I’ve officiated ceremonies in the middle of the desert, homespun backyard weddings, and weddings for 300 at private estates, hotels, golf courses, and country clubs.  If you can dream it, it’s my honor to help you create it.

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